May the way of the Salaryman lead to the Triforce

[dorchadas]

So Nintendo of Australia came out with an ad for The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom and it's...hitting some people a little hard.

Watch on YouTube

All around me are familar faces... 🎶

A man lives his daily life. Every day is the same--he goes to work, does his work, comes home late. He sees his wife for a few minutes before she has to go to bed to get up early. The next day, it starts again. The article where I originally found it ended with the author saying they hoped that this isn't what most middle-aged men's lives were like and a lot of comments on the order of "my sympathies on your future crushing depression" mixed in with "That dude's house is huge! Can I have his life?" Some internet sleuths learned that the ad was based on a review left on Amazon.jp for Breath of the Wild, and I translated a bit of it elsewhere, but here's the full translation.

いつもと同じつまらない景色が違ってみえる

"That same-old boring scenery seems different"

所謂リーマンと呼ばれる社会人です。
通勤ラッシュに揉まれ、顧客にも上司にも頭下げ、
後輩の育成押し付けられて色々やってる内に連日残業。
通勤途中で見える、名前も知らない山にもイラっとする。
フラフラで帰ってきたらメシ食う力も無く、酒飲んで寝る。
ゲームする時間あるなら、セミナー行ったり婚活しないとと、無駄に焦る。
俺なんで生きてんだろと素で思う日々

"I'm one of those people usually called a 'salaryman.'
Jostled to and fro during rush hour, bowing to my boss and to customers,
Putting in overtime every day at work training my juniors and other tasks pushed onto me.
I get annoyed when I see the mountains whose names I don't know on the commute to work.
When I finally crawl home I'm too tired to even eat so I just drink and go to sleep.
If I do have any time to game, then I should be attending a seminar or dating. It's all just so pointless.
Day after day where I wonder why I'm even alive.

切れた酒買いに行った日に見たSwitch店頭販売で思い出した。
子供の頃マリオ64にドハマリしてた頃に、
「今時マリオとかだっせ！ＰＳだろ」
と友人に言われ恥ずかしく思った事。
あの時俺は友達に嫌われたくない一心で、
「確かにもうマリオは古いよな！」と返した事も。

"I remember one day when I was out of booze and went to buy more, I saw a Switch being sold over the counter.
When I was young and obsessed with Mario 64, I was embarrassed when my friend said to me
'These days Mario is trash! Playstation is where it's at!'
I didn't want my friends to hate me so I replied
'Yeah, you're right, Mario is old news.' "

あの当時のＦＦ7の美しさと、ＣＤをテレビで聞けるという衝撃は、
今の子には分からない感覚かもしれない。
それだけ当時の子供には魅力的で革新的だった。

"The beauty of Final Fantasy and the shock of putting in the CD and seeing it on the TV screen is something that kids today might not understand.
That's how fascinating and new it was for kids then."

何故あの時Switchを手に取ったか今でもよくわからない。
ただビール片手に、つまらなければ売ればいいと思って本体とゼルダを購入した。

"I still don't know why I bought a Switch then.
With a beer in one hand I thought, 'Meh, if it's boring I'll just sell it' and bought it and Zelda."

出勤日だった昨日、電車の窓から見えた名前も知らない山を見て、
「登れそう」と思った瞬間、涙が溢れて止まらなかった。
傍にいた同世代のリーマン達には「なんだコイツ」と思われた事だろう。

"Yesterday on the way to work, I looked at the mountains whose name I don't know from out of the window of the train and thought 'I bet I could climb them' and I started crying and couldn't stop. The salarymen my age who were nearby probably thought, 'What's up with this guy?' "

時間に追われ、現状維持の為に憎まれてでも日々併走するリーマン仲間にこそ薦めたい。
たかがゲームとは言わないでくれ。俺達はゲーム黄金期に生まれた。
マリオのジャンプで家族が体ごと動かすのを見たことはないか？
マリカースマブラと、コントローラー持ち寄って遊んだ記憶はないか？
クロノトリガーやＦＦ7の攻略を友人と話し合った事は無いか？
今だから分かる。クソガキだった俺に、両親が誕生日やクリスマスやらで、
クソ高いハードやらソフトやらを買ってくれた事。
ガミガミうるさい傍らで、俺の為に家の金捻出して高いゲームを買ってくれた事。

"I want to recommend this game to all the salarymen of my generation who feel like they're constantly running just to stay in place.
Please don't call it just a game. We were born during the Golden Age of gaming.
Haven't you seen an entire family move their bodies when Mario jumps?
Don't you remember playing Mario Cart or Smash Brothers with the controller in your hand?
Haven't you talked about beating Chrono Trigger or Final Fantasy VII together with your friends?
Now I understand. When I was a snot-faced kid, my parents bought me expensive hardware and software for Christmas or my birthday.
I was always complaining but they got the money together to buy me expensive games."

自分の生活に一生懸命で気付かなかった事に、今更気づいて感動してる。
もっと親孝行すべきだった。

"I was living my life previously in ignorance but I'm touched now that I realize it.
I should have been more dutiful toward my parents."

★5レビューが良い物ばかりだから今更俺が語る事は何もない。
このゼルダは、俺が忘れた「挑戦と報酬」を与えてくれる。
地図無き世界を自由に探索できる、ワクワクする冒険が体験できる。
同世代の俺達は明日を凌ぐために日々病んでいる。だが人生に失望しないでくれ。
こんな所に、俺が望んでいた冒険があったんだと。

"The 5 star reviews are all good ones so I don't have anything more to say.
This Zelda game has given me back the sense of challenge and reward that I had forgotten.
I can freely explore around the empty map and experience an adventure while trembling with anticipation.
My generation is in pain, just enduring the passage of every day. But don't let life get you down.
Because in this place is the adventure that I've always wanted."

PS
今作のゼルダに感謝したい気持ちと、
マリオ64開発スタッフと任天堂に謝罪したい気持ちでいっぱいだ。
マリオ64が大好きだった癖に古いと言った、あの日の嘘を謝りたい。
冬のマリオオデッセイ、心から楽しみにしています。

"I want to thank this Legend of Zelda game and apologize to the Mario 64 development staff and to Nintendo.
Even though I loved Mario 64 I lied and said it was old news.
From the bottom of my heart, I can't wait for Mario Odyssey this winter."

5/7追記です。ウツシエを全部取って180時間、ＥＤを見ました。
それより何より俺のへたくそな長文で、感情に任せて書きなぐった恥ずかしいレビューを、
最後まで見て下さった人たちにお礼を言いたい。そればかりか参考になった押して下さった人、
本当にありがとう。俺仕事でこんな沢山の人に評価された事一度も無いです。
ハイラルを駆けまわった180時間、本当に楽しかった。任天堂のみならず、
ゼルダを支え続けてくれたゼルダファンの方々にもお礼を言いたい。最高の冒険をありがとう。

"This is a May 7th postscript. All told it took me 180 hours to get to the end.
I want to say thank you to everyone who read this whole review, which is slapdash, filled with emotion, and honestly kind of embarrassing.
And to everyone who found it helpful, thank you so much. I've never had so many people appreciate my work.
I had so much fun in the 180 hours I spent running around Hyrule.
And I want to thank not only Nintendo, but all the Zelda fans who have continued to support Zelda. Thank you for such an amazing adventure."

Happy Friday, everyone!

Edit: ahahaha someone did the Mad World version.

Comments

[annofowlshire]

Ahhhh I need to dust off my Switch.

[dorchadas]

My copy of Tears of the Kingdom just came ten minutes ago!!